Tag Archives: International
July 22, 2010

Pilot and Maintenance Log

This humorous article has been circulating on the internet for a few years. It has been credited to both Qantas Airways and UPS. I am posting it here for your reading pleasure. Enjoy!

Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one…a reassurance to those of you, who fly routinely.

After every flight, pilots fill out a form, called a ‘gripe sheet,’ which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft.

The mechanics correct the problems, documents their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor.

Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS (or perhaps Qantas) pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That’s what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you’re right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

Written by in Cross-Cultural Communication, Humor 0 Comments
July 21, 2010

Dining out Overseas

When dining out overseas, table manners are especially important in how well you will be received in business and personal circles. Knowing your etiquette relative to mealtimes and how to conduct yourself could mean the difference between creating a meaningful, lasting impression, or alienating your foreign client or colleague with your In many countries business is not discussed over a meal. Perhaps before and afterward, but attention will be paid to the food at hand and the camaraderie of eating.

 

Some meals can last several hours and liquor can flow freely, so be prepared with a polite excuse to limit your alcoholic consumption, without giving offense. Also, do not take a sip of wine or champagne, in case someone wishes to toast, or until your host has also taken a drink. Conversely, do not expect alcohol to be offered in a Muslim country. If it is offered to you, it would be polite to decline, as your hosts will not drink.

 

It is a practice in England and France to eat hot sandwiches and “beefburgers” with a knife and fork. It is perfectly acceptable to put your bread directly on the tablecloth in France. Germans will use a knife and fork, but they will use the fork both with the tines pointed down and with the tines pointed up. Other countries may only use the dinner fork with the tines pointed down, which is good manners in their country. Thais use a fork and a spoon when eating. It is only in restaurants in the U.S. that chopsticks are offered in Thai restaurants, to appease the local customs.

 

Many countries will have different cutlery for different courses. In formal settings and especially in Europe, you will have a fish fork and a fish knife. Your salad course may be served after the meal in France. You will receive both a fork and a knife for your salad course. Do use both utensils and don’t “save” your fork or knife for your next course. Your teaspoon is not used for dessert, as in the U.S. You will probably be offered a smaller fork and a tablespoon to eat your dessert, or sweet. Knowing that you use the cutlery, or silverware, from the outside in, will serve you well in most instances.

 

It is common in East Asia to use your chopsticks to take food from a common plate or bowl. You choose your food from a platter and place small amounts on your own plate.

 

Chinese will bring a rice bowl up to their chins and quickly scoop the rice in their mouths with their chopsticks. It is normal to slurp, talk with your mouth full and make noises, whilst eating in many countries. Watch your hosts for guidance if you are unsure.

 

If you are invited to dine in the Middle East, gentlemen, do not reach for food with your left hand. You may eat with your fingers there. Watch your host for guidance. Know your finger bowl from a soup bowl!

 

Bon Appetit! Guten Appetit! Buon Appetito! Smacznego!

 

Want to use this blog/article in your next ezine, article or on your website?

You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it.
 
International speaker-trainer and cross-cultural communication expert,Catherine Mowbray Lorenz sees the potential in every individual and company. Her expert knowledge and training moves possibility into profit! If you are looking for simple, no-cost easy ways to boost your sales and  improve relationships in the overseas market, get your FREE communication and presentation tips now at: www.catherinelorenz.com.

 

Written by in Cross-Cultural Communication 0 Comments
June 15, 2010

Use a Form of International English for Ease of Understanding

While recently checking in to an up-market business hotel, in Orange County, CA, the desk clerk was courteous and efficient. However when I presented my credit card to her she asked, “CanIseesomeformofpictureID?” This was said rapidly, with the words run together.

Of course I understood what she meant. However, behind me in the check-in queue was a couple speaking Italian. I wondered if they would understand this request, as it was posed to me.

It is difficult for us to simplify and slow our American English when talking with people whose second or third language is English. They may speak English quite well, but they may have learned it in Singapore or at Oxford, and our American vernacular may not translate at all well.

It would have been more helpful if the hotel employee would have asked to see a driver’s license or passport, with the credit card. However, since some people may not possess a driver’s license or passport, it presents a dilemma. Many countries have driver’s licenses issued for life and the photos issued at age 18 or 20 no longer bear any resemblance to the license holder today.

One of the first points of contacts for a hotel visitor or guest, is the front desk clerk. They may have been greeted briefly by the doorman, but the first conversation a hotel guest would have most likely would be the clerk at check-in.

Would a better way to phrase the request have been, “Sir (or ma’m), do you have any identification with your photograph?” The request would be spoken clearly, distinctly and without running the words together. The word identification would not be abbreviated, so as to avoid confusing the non-native English speaker with “ID”.

It behooves hotel staff and indeed all of us to extend ourselves to international visitors or colleagues to help them to feel as comfortable as possible, starting with the initial contact and a form of English sans abbreviations, vernacular phrases and American expressions.

Want to use this blog/article in your next ezine, article or on your website?

You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it.
International speaker-trainer and cross-cultural communication expert,Catherine Mowbray Lorenz sees the potential in every individual and company. Her expert knowledge and training moves possibility into profit! If you are looking for simple, no-cost easy ways to boost your sales and  improve relationships in the overseas market, get your FREE communication and presentation tips now at: www.catherinelorenz.com.
Written by in Cross-Cultural Communication 0 Comments